Six Ways In Which Modern Parenting Practices Can Disconnect Us From Our Instincts

Schedules

Following a strict schedule means that you follow someone else's idea of what a baby should be doing and when.

Whilst there are some babies who are laid back and will go with the flow and do what the book/app/article says when they say they should, I believe it is definitely a minority!

Following strict schedules can prevent you from finding about your baby's own likes, personality and patterns.

Wake Windows

Wake windows are the idea that a baby of a certain age should be able to stay awake for a certain amount of time.

However they are a pretty new invention and not evidenced-based at all. One bit of truth around wake windows is that as your child gets older, they will be able to stay awake for longer.

Some people who may have difficulty reading their baby can find them useful as a rough guide, but in general learning your own baby's tired cues can be far more effective.

Timing how long a feed lasts

If you have a very new or early baby then a short feed can mean they have fallen asleep before they were finished, but for a full-term baby who is feeding well they might be finished in 5 minutes or even less.

The length of a feed can depend on how fast your milk flows and how efficient the baby is.

And feeds get quicker with age.

And of course, sometimes babies may just want a quick drink, sometimes a full meal and sometimes an all you can eat buffet.

How many hours your baby has fed out of the last 24 hours (apps often tell people this figure) also does not tell us anything other than, yes, breastfed babies feed a lot!

Measuring Volumes of Milk

Whilst of course it is important that your baby receives enough milk to grow and thrive, our society is obsessed with measuring the volume.

At a health appointment and someone will ask you how much milk baby is taking. "um a boobful or two?"

"Top up with xx ml" is the go-to recommendation for any slow weight gain situation often with no actual support to help breastfeeding be more effective and no exit plan.

Weighing Babies Too Frequently

Again it is important to make sure babies are getting enough milk to grow and develop.

However there is a big obsession with weighing babies.

Babies should be weighed quite frequently in the first week or two or until baby is back to birthweight, to make sure everything is going okay.

But if everything is going well, it is actually suggested to then just weigh monthly at most. If there are weight concerns, we may suggest weekly or fortnightly.

Babies tend to grow in spurts, so we want to see a general trend of them tracking their curve on the growth chart.

Infants Must Develop Independent Sleep By A Certain Age

All babies and children are different when it comes to independent sleep.

Yes there are some who will happily self-settle in a cot for their naps and sleep in longer chunks at night.

But there are many who need support to sleep whether that be your presence, movement or feeding to sleep. And this is completely normal!

Kathryn Stagg’s website: https://kathrynstaggibclc.com/ and Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kathrynstaggibclc?igsh=MThnaWJhb2Exd2E1dA==